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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 5, 2009 12:20:30 GMT 1
Quoted from another thread The bar staff, on the other hand, looked like extra’s from Shameless. Mike returned to the bar to be told that they had run out of beer. Never has the term ‘piss up in a brewery’ been more apt If that's the bar staff in the ground, then I have to agree. I tried to get a hot chocolate for the nipper from the cart at the front of the LBL, only to be told when I reached the front of the queue that they had 'run out of hot water'. Seeing as how they only sell hot drinks, why not just tell everyone and save them queuing? Or better still fuck off. Then went up to the kiosk under the stand, queued for 10-15 minutes. Trust me to join the queue being served by the missing link, the queues either side sailed past as he worked out how to put one foot in front of the other and dribble at the same time. When I got near the front (about five minutes after the restart) It would appear that they had 'run out of hot water'... Christ on a bike! The bloke who I assume was in charge suggested that we use the 'next kiosk along'. That'd be the one that was closed then, nobhead? Piss up? Brewery? Yes those fit together in a very apt manner...And, while I'm at it, if that's Tetley's coming out of the bitter pump then I'm a Dutch wrestler called Wim. The first couple of times I took it back thinking it was line cleaner, before realising it was supposed to taste like that! When does their contract run out? Make my day and tell me it's tomorrow... Edited to intensify the ranting experience...
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Post by Jello Biafra on Jan 5, 2009 12:41:21 GMT 1
Actually, the original thread was relating to the Market Tavern.
However, your post has just brightened up my DATM 'experience' this morning, and for that I will be forever grateful. Top post, that man.
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Post by andyfcuk85 on Jan 5, 2009 12:47:24 GMT 1
Quoted from another thread The bar staff, on the other hand, looked like extra’s from Shameless. Mike returned to the bar to be told that they had run out of beer. Never has the term ‘piss up in a brewery’ been more apt If that's the bar staff in the ground, then I have to agree. I tried to get a hot chocolate for the nipper from the cart at the front of the LBL, only to be told when I reached the front of the queue that they had 'run out of hot water'. Seeing as how they only sell hot drinks, why not just tell everyone and save them queuing? Or better still fuck off. Then went up to the kiosk under the stand, queued for 10-15 minutes. Trust me to join the queue being served by the missing link, the queues either side sailed past as he worked out how to put one foot in front of the other and dribble at the same time. When I got near the front (about five minutes after the restart) It would appear that they had 'run out of hot water'... Christ on a bike! The bloke who I assume was in charge suggested that we use the 'next kiosk along'. That'd be the one that was closed then, nobhead? Piss up? Brewery? Yes those fit together in a very apt manner...And, while I'm at it, if that's Tetley's coming out of the bitter pump then I'm a Dutch wrestler called Wim. The first couple of times I took it back thinking it was line cleaner, before realising it was supposed to taste like that! When does their contract run out? Make my day and tell me it's tomorrow... Edited to intensify the ranting experience... With regards hot drinks I was told that the taps where not working from previous weeks and it was a lottery as to wether they wrked - this came from the person behind the counter
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Post by dxterrier on Jan 5, 2009 12:50:49 GMT 1
and not one of em had a kettle, typical, similar story in the antich, only they had run out of most hot foods at half time.....was like being in russia.
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Post by Scissett Terrier! on Jan 5, 2009 12:52:16 GMT 1
its never going to bet better becuase they wont pay to have someone with a brain cell behind the counter
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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 5, 2009 12:57:52 GMT 1
...was like being in russia. No, that's the feeling I got in Woolworth's just before Christmas, nothing on the shelves but beetroot... ;D
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Post by Deleted on Jan 5, 2009 12:58:12 GMT 1
;D Absolutely hilarious (sorry to laugh when they clearly p*ssed you off)
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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 5, 2009 13:03:11 GMT 1
;D Absolutely hilarious (sorry to laugh when they clearly p*ssed you off) If you didn't laugh you'd...hang on a minute, where did I put that chainsaw? ;D
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Davey Monroe
David Wagner Terrier
[M0:0][N4:#@David_Major#]
Posts: 2,863
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Post by Davey Monroe on Jan 5, 2009 13:05:59 GMT 1
That's nothing compared to our experience at Stockport a few seasons back.
After queuing for ages I asked for 4 beers; I was told... "We're not serving alcohol". Fair enough, I'll have 4 Cokes then... "We've run out of soft drinks and we're out of hot water too, so you can't have a hot drink either I'm afraid" So, what do you have? Water? "The water isn't drinkable sir" What DO you have then! I asked. "Crisps?" replied the spotty Manc behind the counter.
Oh to be a lower league football fan...
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Post by timrankhan on Jan 5, 2009 13:17:20 GMT 1
I remeber being at Rochdale in 2003 when at least half the ground were town fans and the cleverly decided not to serve beers. Despite having fridges stocked with cans of Kaltenburg! Ridiculous....just like Town charging £3.00 for a crap burger
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hebdenblue
Darren Bullock Terrier
[M0:0]
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Post by hebdenblue on Jan 5, 2009 13:27:22 GMT 1
doesnt help jonnyzero but ive found the burger van parked in corner of antich as I walk in to be fairly handy this season - hope it stays
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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 5, 2009 13:31:51 GMT 1
Ridiculous....just like Town charging £3.00 for a crap burger At least they don't burn them like at Carlisle, setting off the fire alarms that automatically trigger the shutters that seal in the catering staff like smoking beagles... Hang on lads, I've got a great idea...It's the humane thing to do... ;D
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Post by bluearmy86 on Jan 5, 2009 21:01:41 GMT 1
This is a brief transcript from my visit to the pie/pint sellers at half time from a home game last season. I am me, The boy Clueless is the character behind the counter who struggled with the language somewhat.
Me: Could i have a chicken balti pie and a bovril please? The boy clueless: Coffee? Me: No, a chicken balti pie and a bovril. The boy clueless: Pie? Me:Yes, a chicken balti pie please.
At this point the boy clueless poured a bovril and failed to produce any form of snack.
Me: And a chicken balti pie please. The boy clueless: Pie? Me: Yes mate, pie.
At this point the boy clueless duly delivered a pie, unfortunately it's contents were Meat & Potato.
Now being a fat lad I enjoyed the pie only slightly less than if I had been given the flavour of pie requested, so i wasn't too bothered. But it left me thinking, who has given this guy the job of serving people who he doesn't understand?!
Surely he hasn't had any form of interview? Unless randomly all the answers to the questions asked in an interview were food types?!
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Post by Deleted on Jan 5, 2009 21:11:40 GMT 1
pay peanuts get monkeys as the saying goes.
As I have said before I have a friend who worked for that lot, whatever the name they go under now, and the stories she tells would make an excellent 30 min sitcom ;D
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Post by BradfordTerrier on Jan 5, 2009 21:15:45 GMT 1
at one game last season i had to lean over and show 'missing link of the week' how to work the chuffin til!
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Post by dxterrier on Jan 5, 2009 22:15:00 GMT 1
And to think, we once won second place in a football league catering contest, or was that just for the pies.
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Post by Scissett Terrier! on Jan 5, 2009 22:32:11 GMT 1
i once asked for two pints and got two halfs of murky water and to halfs of foam,
i promptly asked for two pints not two halfs to which in now in not so perfect english i was told they were metered pumps, the enitre que was pissing itself and toook me around 5 more mintues to get missing link to fill them up!
now i cant be bothered having a beer there, their loss!
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leedsterrier
Steve Kindon Terrier
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Post by leedsterrier on Jan 5, 2009 22:37:09 GMT 1
How they can charge £3 for a Carlsberg is a mystery to me. Not withstanding that it's probably one of the worst beers going, they never give you a full pint, even if you ask them to top it up!
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Post by Admin on Jan 5, 2009 22:39:13 GMT 1
I once asked for a pint of bitter. The guy behind the counter said "bitter?". This was repeated about half a dozen times. Anyway, eventually he handed over THE worst pint of smiths I've ever seen/tasted. I handed it back and aked for another that wasnt flat/off. He preceded to bend down behind the counter for a moment then come back up with a grin on his face clutching the self same pint. Laugh? I almost died ;D
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Post by Scissett Terrier! on Jan 5, 2009 23:06:35 GMT 1
I once asked for a pint of bitter. The guy behind the counter said "bitter?". This was repeated about half a dozen times. Anyway, eventually he handed over THE worst pint of smiths I've ever seen/tasted. I handed it back and aked for another that wasnt flat/off. He preceded to bend down behind the counter for a moment then come back up with a grin on his face clutching the self same pint. Laugh? I almost died ;D manc that is quite possibly the funniest things ive ever heard, where do they bus these idiots in from?
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jackosgal
Frank Worthington Terrier
Ooh 2 be a.....
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Post by jackosgal on Jan 5, 2009 23:09:14 GMT 1
I have to report similar experiences in the DG Lower.
I'm not a big drinker, but I do enjoy a lager before taking my seat, but I don't know wether it's because I'm female and by that token I cannot possibly want beer, or if it's the language barrier. I'm nealy always asked"..coffee?..". What a nuisence.
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Post by henseventee on Jan 5, 2009 23:14:52 GMT 1
This is a brief transcript from my visit to the pie/pint sellers at half time from a home game last season. I am me, The boy Clueless is the character behind the counter who struggled with the language somewhat. Me: Could i have a chicken balti pie and a bovril please? The boy clueless: Coffee? Me: No, a chicken balti pie and a bovril. The boy clueless: Pie? Me:Yes, a chicken balti pie please. At this point the boy clueless poured a bovril and failed to produce any form of snack. Me: And a chicken balti pie please. The boy clueless: Pie? Me: Yes mate, pie. At this point the boy clueless duly delivered a pie, unfortunately it's contents were Meat & Potato. Now being a fat lad I enjoyed the pie only slightly less than if I had been given the flavour of pie requested, so i wasn't too bothered. But it left me thinking, who has given this guy the job of serving people who he doesn't understand?! Surely he hasn't had any form of interview? Unless randomly all the answers to the questions asked in an interview were food types?! Read reply #13 at downatthemac.proboards106.com/index.cgi?action=display&board=general&thread=3277&page=1It's not uncommon. You could perhaps surmise that gareth.hardcastle@eventmanagementcatering.com was taking the piss with all the effort Mids put in, given that was back in February and its now January the next year... Extracted here:- Me:"Balti pie please". Odd:"Batty?" Me:"Balti pie." Odd: Points at cornish pasties with a questioning face. Me:"No. BALTI. PIE. Erm...just a pie. ANY pie". Pointing at pies. Me:"And a coffee please" Odd:"Hot chocolate?". Me:"No. Coffee" Me: Wanders off. Confused.
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Post by martin27 on Jan 5, 2009 23:15:13 GMT 1
"The bar staff, on the other hand, looked like extra’s from Shameless.
Mike returned to the bar to be told that they had run out of beer. Never has the term ‘piss up in a brewery’ been more apt " no the above statement was the moaning the oldham fans did on there match report,i just shortened there moans down abit,if the bar staff were like the shameless ones we`d be off our heads on E`s too
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Post by kleverboy on Jan 5, 2009 23:46:55 GMT 1
Is this the funniest thread ever?
bluearmy86... you're my new hero. ;D
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Post by bluearmy86 on Jan 6, 2009 1:37:12 GMT 1
henseventee, such similar stories! They are terrible.
Has anyone noticed the especially deficient ones that just stare blankly, only to move when asked to fetch a pie by someone who can speak the language?!
Is there any job worse than 'Fetcher of pies'?
I can imagine the conversation upon meeting such a person outside of work.
Me: So, what do you do? Fetcher of pies: Coffee? Me: Say no more.
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Post by mattyterrier2k8 on Jan 6, 2009 11:41:50 GMT 1
our catering has to be the worst i have ever known out of every ground ive ever been to, carlsberg £3 a pint with a quarter off it like an ice cream, if you want a pie its pot luck you get the one you actually want, £1.50 for a bottle of coke and that burger bar at the corner of the antich is £4 for a double cheeseburger! the staff are just like the stewards a joke but if you pay peanuts you get monkeys. the beer always tastes weird and is like water, wasnt we trying to get bottled beer down at the galph at one point?
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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 6, 2009 12:56:51 GMT 1
the beer always tastes weird and is like water, wasnt we trying to get bottled beer down at the galph at one point? We now have bottled Carlsberg in the LBL, now assuming it's not relabelled KwikSave FireSale Lager, it's not too bad. 500ml for £2.50, a similar price to the draught. Is a pint 547ml, which is £3? That's 300ml of beer of indeterminate brand or quality and 247ml of Mr Softee. I remain unconvinced that it's Carlsberg or Tetley spewing forth from the pumps. The catering is a slight improvement from last year, there seems to less need to take a phrase book or consult BabelFish than last season. Which is good, because I don't know the Iraqi for, "Do you want a flake in that, love?"
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Post by mattyterrier2k8 on Jan 6, 2009 13:03:25 GMT 1
We now have bottled Carlsberg in the LBL not fair >:(us in the antich cant have bottled beer boooo does the bottled beer over there actually taste like beer then? wish it did in our end, need to have a word with mr jarvis utt
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Post by henseventee on Jan 6, 2009 13:16:34 GMT 1
assuming it's not relabelled KwikSave FireSale Lager I thought you said thats what they had at Carlisle?
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Post by johnnyzero on Jan 6, 2009 13:19:14 GMT 1
assuming it's not relabelled KwikSave FireSale Lager I thought you said thats what they had at Carlisle? That was to sterilise it
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