Bernie
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Post by Bernie on Jan 24, 2012 13:13:39 GMT 1
.. I realise I am old, and in no way down wit the kidz and their newfangled muziks, but how on earth can anyone who doesn't have old bits of rotten ham stuffed full of mouldy cheese and piss instead of ears bear even a microsecond of her awful, AWFUL "I want nothing but the best for you" bullshit? Seriously. It sounds like someone slowly kicking a cat to death. For ages.
Who buys this shit? Come on, hands up, statistically speaking at least someone here must do.
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Post by JohnnyNeptune on Jan 24, 2012 14:31:26 GMT 1
"Who buys this shit? Come on, hands up, statistically speaking at least someone here must do."
with 3 million sales in the uk and about 67 million people, i think you're wildly over-optimistic that there are 22 people who use this place regularily
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 24, 2012 14:54:07 GMT 1
*Counts on fingers. Runs out of fingers after eleven*
Dammit, you're probably right. Unless you're covering up something, which I'm almost certain you are.
Isn't adele a sort of penguin?
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Post by fgrfc_dan on Jan 24, 2012 15:29:22 GMT 1
I think the rule is something along the lines of: people are successful through either looks or talent. She's not attractive, so she must therefore be talented.
She's not talented, of course, but once she's managed to get played on the radio once or twice people assume she must be, so it becomes self-perpetuating.
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Post by Gag_N_Bone_Man on Jan 24, 2012 15:45:16 GMT 1
My wife buys this shit. :suicide:
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 24, 2012 16:42:01 GMT 1
HA! In YOUR FACE, Neptune. Cup them like you mean it.
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merkin
Darren Bullock Terrier
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Post by merkin on Jan 24, 2012 19:11:45 GMT 1
i bought the album for a joke for my lad.
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Post by turtle on Jan 25, 2012 11:58:05 GMT 1
My wife buys this shit too.
I really don't get Florence. Then I never really got Kate Bush so this is hardly a surprise.
My lad likes JLS.
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Post by joncbee on Jan 25, 2012 12:33:24 GMT 1
"My wife buys this shit."
You think you've got problems? My wife buys* Lady fucking Gaga.
"My lad likes JLS."
He's gay.
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Post by turtle on Jan 25, 2012 12:46:46 GMT 1
You ought to free your mind and listen to the Lady Gaga albums. I can't believe I am admitting this publically* but they're actually alright. As are JLS. In a they-can-plainly-sing-and have-some-half-decent-harmless-songs-and-hold-an-album-for-its-full-length-without-falling-into-a-dirge kind of way.
Katy Perry on the other hand makes me ears bleed. As does Rihanna. And the rest of the tosh that I am forced to endure.
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Post by Gag_N_Bone_Man on Jan 25, 2012 13:43:38 GMT 1
Katy Perry on the other hand makes me ears bleed. As does Rihanna. And the rest of the tosh that I am forced to endure. Rihanne makes my palms hairy.... :  : |
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 25, 2012 14:28:38 GMT 1
Gaga = moderately decent modern pop songs, but not a tenth as groundbreaking or innovative as her and her fans seem to think. Essentially an unattractive Kylie in a wig made of brisket and condoms.
Florence - pointless, watery voiced, wet-knickered art-school nightmare.
What's a JLS? Is it like JLB8?
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Post by turtle on Jan 25, 2012 14:54:17 GMT 1
I sort of feel vindicated about Gaga.
Katy Perry's album is the worst thing I have heard in decades.
Bernie : JLS = an uptempo Boyz II Men from Croydon
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brispie
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Post by brispie on Jan 26, 2012 12:03:20 GMT 1
I know nothing about any of this apart from the fact that my wife makes me listen to Adele when we are on long journeys and it is bland to the point of pointlessness.
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Post by joncbee on Jan 26, 2012 13:01:56 GMT 1
"they-can-plainly-sing-and have-some-half-decent-harmless-songs-and-hold-an-album-for-its-full-length-without-falling-into-a-dirge"
I put this to you:
Why would I bother to listen to anything that is half-decent and harmless when large quantities of full-decent and/or harmful music exists?
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 26, 2012 14:41:29 GMT 1
Because you want to keep the peace with the missus? (Even if she does go all quiet and passive aggressive when you play Beefheart, Butthole Surfers, or violent, misogynist hip hop)
I got told off for complaining about "We Are the World" the other day. The incredibly accurate impersonations I subsequently did of Bruce Springsteen, Bob Dylan and Huey Lewis's parts didn't seem to rescue the situation either.
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Post by turtle on Jan 26, 2012 15:14:08 GMT 1
What Bernice says. I'm open to listening to bits of commercial shite so when I do spout an opinion of it, I do so with at least a fair degree of understanding. Rather than just saying it's shite about anything that sells more than 1,000 copies, which is what grown-ups did I was a kid.
With JLS, I get entertained by comedy gurning and arm movements from the boy. Which is preferable to them turning green when I play them the latest MES effort.
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brispie
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Post by brispie on Jan 26, 2012 16:07:12 GMT 1
You let your children listen to this stuff? I'm calling social services.
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Post by JohnnyNeptune on Jan 26, 2012 17:44:07 GMT 1
why brispie i'm shocked? imposing your will on your kids and not letting them do or listen to what they want? you fascist.
meg loves wand erection. th'album was surprisingly bearable. i've not let her put it on again mind.
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gymmers
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Post by gymmers on Jan 26, 2012 18:58:11 GMT 1
Adele produces musick to slit your wrists to
Gaga is rubbish
The only tolerable thing Kate Bush did was The Man With The Child in His Japs Eye
Katy Perry is shit, too, but Mr Lizard wants to get in her knickers, unlike Russell Brand
Florence did a good version of 'You've Got the Love'. Lizard wants to bone her, too.
Rihanna as a ho who makes me want to kill furry kittens when I hear Um BA Rella Ella Ella Eh Eh Eh
She and Tinie Tempah have 'feat'd on more singles than a ten year old has 'feat'd on the end of Gary Glitter's cock.
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 27, 2012 8:44:03 GMT 1
No she didn't. She really, REALLY didn't - it sounds like a particularly shy girl with a weak voice who can't hold a tune being forced to murder an astonishingly imagination-bereft karaoke version by a pushy uncle. And I'll refrain from making a snippy comment about Mr Lizard's boning tastes - he is, after all, from Basingstoke IIRC. The town that attractive women forgot - or at least avoid by several miles.
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merkin
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Post by merkin on Jan 27, 2012 9:38:32 GMT 1
'wand erection'
pisser
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Post by fgrfc_dan on Jan 27, 2012 10:16:21 GMT 1
On the whole I quite like Florence but she did a shit version of 'You've got the love' made worse by the fact that 90% of her fans seem to think she wrote it.
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Fenton
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Post by Fenton on Jan 27, 2012 11:44:33 GMT 1
I liked Flo's first album and I should of* listened to TigerWoods' review of her second album (he said it was shit) and not bothered getting it.
it was fucking awful ... on a par with the Guillemots second offering.
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Bernie
Jimmy Glazzard Terrier
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Post by Bernie on Jan 27, 2012 12:01:46 GMT 1
Fenton! How the cuntfuck are you?
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Fenton
Iain Dunn Terrier
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Post by Fenton on Jan 27, 2012 12:51:21 GMT 1
Hello Bernie!
Did someone edit my post? I'm can't believe that I starred out fucking
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Fenton
Iain Dunn Terrier
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Post by Fenton on Jan 27, 2012 12:51:53 GMT 1
Buggerations. what's going on?
This is çunting censorship
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brispie
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Post by brispie on Jan 27, 2012 16:46:12 GMT 1
There's a fine balance between controlling what they hear and making sure they don't know about something so they don't even know that they want to hear it.
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Post by GroveR on Jan 30, 2012 9:58:39 GMT 1
For once Bernie is talking sense. That fúck-awful Florence/Dizee "You got the Dirtee Cash" *mashup* at the Brits made me want to slice my own glans off with an aluminium beer-can.
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ab
Andy Booth Terrier
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Post by ab on Jan 30, 2012 16:51:57 GMT 1
Sadly mrs b has the second Adele album and OMB loves it. Luckily he now seems to have been weaned off listening to it on repeat on long car journeys and likes the last metronomy album.
I listened to disintegration on my wonderful 4 hour commute to slough this morning. It is still amazing nearly a quarter of a century on. Adele did a poor cover of a song off it on 21.
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